We All Need Wiener Email. Even You!
Feeling trepidation and uncertainty over the current financial crisis? All this serious finance business and politics is no fun! So in an effort to have a good time, I scoured my spam folder to bring you this: the latest from my collection of funny wiener emails! I loooove wiener emails! And I know you do too, because it’s really a window into the soul of our culture. It’s evidence of our constant struggle to improve the species. And everyone knows you can achieve all your personal goal plus the goals of humanity in general by having a large organ!! Just ask Millie Peacock, because she is an expert and she emails me regularly to inform me that a larger cucumber is within my — er — grasp, so to speak, that even I can have a larger and bigger pole. By this I think she means Polish boyfriend because I am a woman afterall! So, without hesitation or trepidation please read on to learn how YOU can become like an African Bushman!
Who said spam was worthless and annoying?
Funny Wiener Email Redux!
Amazing how quickly my bulk mail fills with these beauties! Lord knows, we’re all searching for perfection. For women it’s those few pounds around the hips. For men it appears to be wiener improvement. Which is about as easy to attain as losing those last few pounds. Read on for the key to immeasurable happiness!
My Treasured Collection
Many people collect things. Seashells, buttons, stamps, old cars. People (including me) feel a deep need for order, for the visual satisfaction of similarly grouped items. The order is suffused with the memory of each event that brought a new item to the group. I feel all of this and more with my collection. Me? I collect Funny Wiener Emails. Scoff if you will, but there’s a mighty joy and a rush of pleasure (of a different sort!) when I open my spam folder and find a gem hidden there amongst the lowly trivial viagra ads. Imagine my delight when I found “turn that trouser mouse into a monster schlong.” Trouser mouse! The brilliance! Or another of my favorites, “rise from the dead ye little head.” It is at once nasty and explicit, while at the exact moment, the perfect poetic metaphor!
Here it is ladies and gents, my Funny Wiener Email collection:
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